Writing skills

I'd like to think that almost a year of blogging has resulted in improved writing ability. If so, then how in the world did I come with this sentence from an earlier post?

One of the arguments that I hear a lot from people who think that Bush is a bad president and should not be elected this November is that he pushed for and signed the USA PATRIOT Act.

Sure, it's grammatically correct, and it conveys the concept I want it to convey, but it just doesn't pop. It doesn't sing. I will therefore rewrite it thusly:

One of the many arguments presented by people who believe that Bush is a poor president, and that he should not be re-elected this November, is that he pushed for and signed the USA PATRIOT Act.

It's not very different; it still says the same thing. But it seems to flow much better. It also gets rid of the banal word "bad" which, given that I fancy myself to be rather proficient in using the English language, just didn't look right to me.